taking charge, and feeling a little blue

I said in my last post that you really have to take charge of you own health. You must be proactive and you must follow through - no one will do it for you. I really mean it.

For example, yesterday I called to make an appointment for my MRI. Remember back in September I had a bad mammogram? They said to come back in 6 months for an MRI. I called and the orders weren't in my records. Ugh! That made me so upset. But I screwed up my courage, fought back the tears, and called the radiology department. Talked to a very sweet lady who said it was written in my records but the request (or whatever the correct terminology is - I think I need a brain MRI!) was not there. So she got a tech to do it. Voila'! Look how close I came to throwing in the towel?! So I have to call back this afternoon and schedule the appointment. Wish me luck that I don't get any grief!

Another example, last week was the two week mark when I was to call the doc if that spot on my face had not healed. It had healed considerably, but still not all the way. I even asked a friend what she thought. Don't you just hate being in that position - should I or shouldn't I? I didn't want to self diagnose, so I ended up leaving a message with the doc describing what I saw. She called back making an appointment with me for today. I just got back from there. I could have easily blown it off. Anyway, the upshot of today's appointment, she took a scrape and will send it to the lab. She gave me 3 choices: freeze it again, take the scrape biopsy, go directly to a dermatologist. So now I have this ugly wound on my temple. But at least I will have peace of mind that I will KNOW.

The C word has been in my vocabulary too much in my lifetime. Hate it.
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Oh, the sad part? The other night I took some pictures of my progress. I thought it would be a good idea to take a picture of what I look like in a t-shirt - au natural. It was awful! My bit is higher and wide right - you can tell there's an oddity at 30 paces! Egads! Good thing I don't ever plan to go braless! I swear it was a shock to me. You see, my bathroom mirror is a magical mirror. When I look in there I don't see my wrinkles or gray hair and my you-know-whats are front and center. The camera is an awful, awful thing. I don't know why, but it never pictures me the same as what I see in the mirror. Weird. I guess it's like your voice. You hear one thing, but everyone else hears something different.
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It's been rainy and chilly all day. It's been chilly for at least a week now. I know, it's snowing like gangbusters on the mainland - well, we're getting paradise's version of winter. Brrrrr.

I made a really good lunch today. It's black beans and rice with pumpkin vinaigrette that I got from the blog Megan's Munchies. Never fear. It doesn't taste like pumpkin at all. And it's mellow, despite the balsamic vinegar. But I think I would cut back on the oil in the future. I like easy meatless lunches. Tastey too!

I have an interesting main dish up my sleeve for TT tonight! The report will come tomorrow.